When the child reaches puberty, he becomes fully accountable for his deeds in front of Allah (SWT). It is first and foremost the responsibility of the parents to carry this message to the child.
The parents of the adolescent boy should inform him that the first time he ejaculates he becomes accountable for his actions in front of Allah (SWT), and he should perform the acts of worship in the same way that adult Muslims do.
When the girl is about nine years old, her parents should inform her that the first time she sees blood (menstruation), she becomes accountable for her acts and the worship acts prescribed on the Muslim women are also prescribed on her.
When the child reaches puberty, there are rules that the parents should explain to him, which include:
· If the child has a sexual dream, he does not have to take a bath (ghusl) unless he sees or feels wetness in his clothes or sheets due to sperm ejaculation in the case of the boy, or vaginal discharge in the case of the girl (the type of viscous discharge that commonly occurs after a woman has had orgasm). Such was the answer of the Prophet (SAW) to Khawlah Bint Hakeem, who asked him if a woman should make ghusl when she has a sexual dream. He (SAW) said:
"No ghusl on her unless she has a discharge, similarly there is not ghusl on the man unless he ejaculates." (Related by Ahmad and Al-Nasa’i)
· When the child wakes up and sees or feels wetness due to sexual discharge, he/she should perform ghusl even if he/she did not remember having any dream.
· When the boy ejaculates due to sexual arousal, whether voluntary or involuntary, he should perform ghusl. The same rule applies for the girl if she had an orgasm or vaginal discharge.
· Young men and young women who are about to get married should know that during sexual intercourse, as soon as penetration occurs they both should perform ghusl whether there was discharge or not. The Prophet (SAW) said:
"When he sits between her arms and legs, and the two organs touch, and his organ disappears (in her), there should be ghusl, whether he ejaculated or not." (Related by Muslim)
· When the girl does not see any more blood at the end of her menses, she should perform ghusl. The married woman should know that after child birth she should make ghusl as soon as she stops bleeding. The next step is obviously to teach the child how to perform ghusl and the Sunan acts of ghusl. He or she should know the acts that are unlawful to him or her while in a state of sexual impurity. These include:
"They ask you concerning menstruation. Say: that is an Adha (a harmful thing for a husband to have a sexual intercourse with his wife while she is having her menses), therefore keep away from women during menses and go not unto them until they have purified (from menses and taken a bath)..." (Al-Baqarah 2:222)
There is NO evidence whatsoever that says that a woman who is on her period or a woman who is having post-natal bleeding that she can not touch the Quran. See Natural Blood of Women for evidence.
Information from Al-Jumuah Magazine Issue 5, Sha’baan 1416, Page 12