Sexual education is a phrase that is taboo for many Muslims. The reason is that sexual education in this society is often taught by people who encourage fornication and sexual deviations. How can a Muslim parent then not worry when schools and mass media portray fornication as sexual freedom, and homosexuality as an acceptable ‘sexual orientation?’ But does this mean that Muslim parents and educators should choose that their children have no sexual education at all? The answer is no! Children will always receive some kind of sexual education, and eve if you isolate them, they will still get it, even from other children! The correct attitude should be to give our children the right sexual education, the one that is derived from the Quran and the Sunnah. It is therefore the obligation of every parent to be prepared for this delicate task.
As the child goes through different developmental periods, his or her education too should be planned in stages, and each stage should be appropriate to the age of the child. Although children’s maturity vary greatly at any given age, there are four main stages that most children go through:
1. The age of discernment, i.e., between seven and ten years. At this age, the child should know the etiquette for asking permission to enter the parent's room.
2. The age of adolescence, or preteen, which is from ten to fourteen years. At this age, the child should learn how to avoid sexual arousal, and should be protected from it.
3. The age of puberty, between fourteen and sixteen years, when the child should know the etiquette of sexual intercourse, if he or she is ready to get married in the near future.
4. At youth, when they are sixteen years or older, the unmarried young men and women should learn sexual abstinence, and the dangers of adultery and fornication (zina).
Information from Al-Jumuah Magazine Issue 5, Sha’baan 1416, Pages 6 and 7